Tuesday, October 19, 2010

My Dream Wedding Reception

I've never really caught the vision of what I wanted my wedding reception to be like... until now.

To preface this, let me explain my personal feelings toward receptions.

First off, they are suspiciously similar to funerals. (Except for me, funerals are happier since they remind me of Christmas - which may be confusing if you don't know my family background).

Secondly, what's the appeal of sitting awkwardly at fancy tables with a bunch of humans you don't know, trying to pleasantly converse about the weather, decorations, or any other commonalities you might have, with said stranger who is sharing the same uncomfortable experience?

Thirdly, you are probably having the aforementioned conversation while attempting to get the whole chocolate-covered strawberry into your mouth before the goop dribbles down your chin and onto your blouse in the most unclassy manner.

Finally, you are expected to wait in line for half an hour just to say hi for five seconds to an exhausted couple that looks like they are about ready to drop dead.

They've already been through: hours spent getting ready for the day, the ceremony, the paparazzi, the bride walking around in a dress that probably weighs more than she does, and the general stress of actually GETTING married and all the changes that entails. These people don't want to be there after all that, shaking hand after hand. They're married! Release them from their present torment!

Apart from making the couple feel exhausted and anxious, and the guests feel superfluous and awkward, I just don't see what this ritual does to help humanity.

To be fair, there are some positives.

1. Knowing your friends are supporting you on your wedding day. (I guess I'd rather just have them come to the ceremony).

2. Loot. ie: Presents. (I'd rather just take the money NOT spent on the venue, decorations, and food and buy my own loot).

3. The parents get to celebrate and the siblings get to meet the spouse's family. This is the most valid and irrefutable argument in favor of receptions that I can think of. And this alone will probably cause me to have a reception when the time comes.

Which is why I have now planned out my dream reception to make the experience more positive.

My Dream Wedding Reception!!!

My colors will be red and white.

For refreshments, I will have cookies and orange juice.

My family won't have to pay for it, because my entire reception will be sponsored by the Red Cross.

No presents please, my honorable guests, just relax and lie down on this comfortable recliner. We're going to surprise you with a blood drive!!!

Yeah! Now THAT is a constructive use of time!

Disclaimer: I really don't hate wedding receptions as much as this post indicates. I have also, on occasion, enjoyed them. Especially if it looks like the couple is also enjoying it. I would be more than happy to come to your reception when the time comes for you to get married. :-) Oh, and I'm not really going to have a blood drive, so you can come to my reception without fear, too.

1 comment:

emilyf said...


But, seriously, I share your sentiments. I don't want the traditional wedding reception.

Some things I've thought of that may or may not be part of my "dream" reception:

Since I do want to meet and see people and I'm not sure how to avoid that, I guess I'd still have the line. But most people come for the food, too. So, I'd arrange food sampling tables along the path toward bride and groom; they don't just wait in a line, they get food as they advance!

But, if people want food without having to stand in line, there will be another set of food tables as usual. That way people can get seconds if they want, without fighting a line.

Next, this food arrangement could possibly eliminate the need for as many tables and that available space would be filled with more fun things to sit on...like hammocks, bean bags and other such relaxing things...it's a dream reception, just go with it :)

I've even thought there should be a "movie corner" where a movie about the couple is showing on repeat for those who would like to know more without having to stand and ask questions awkwardly as the line behind them inches anxiously forward to move them along. (cuz isn't that the worst to get stuck standing right in front of members of the other family who you don't know AT ALL? haha) The movie corner would be a great place for the bean bags to be set up. :) And at my wedding, there will most definitely be popcorn...my family is kind of...popcorn fanatic.

It seems this post of yours was more just a random rambling and may not be too serious, but whatever you LOVE you must have at your wedding, says I. It's your perfect day. You want everyone to come and you want to see them, but I also say you shouldn't have to do it at the expense of exhaustion and stress.

Aaaanyway, just thought I'd think out loud. :)