Sunday, March 29, 2009


Recently I've found myself at a loss for what to do and where to go in my life. Being directionless is perhaps, one of the worst feelings in the world. I was looking around on my old computer that I'm going to give to a friend in Ghana for any documents I might want to transfer before I give it away. I found a list of goals from a few years ago.

Here are some of the ones I have actually accomplished since then:
-Get scuba certified
-Get an MPA
-Go to the temple at least twice a month
-Go to Asia
-Start learning guitar
-Run a marathon
-Spend a summer back in Africa on a humanitarian project (I've been back three times)
-Save at least 10% of income
-Pay back student loans within four years (I did it in one)
-Exercise at least three times a week
-Make a flower garden (I made many at the temple while working grounds)

Here are some random ones I have not done yet:
-Make a cabinet
-Get a PhD
-Scripture study in the morning (More often than not, I do it late at night)
-Go to Zambia, Malawi, Lesotho and Swaziland to help with health care
-Visit the Meijsen and Van Zyl and Mwalee families (families baptized during my mission)
-Climb Mount Kilimanjaro
-Have a vegetable garden
-Start a school in Kenya (though I've been helping with one in Congo)
-Scuba in the Great Barrier Reef
-Eat 2 or more servings of fruits and veggies per day
-Learn to play piano well
-Read at least 2 books per month
-Go to Brazil, Italy, and an island (Fiji, Tonga, Samoa)
-Enjoy doing the dishes

I found that at least half of the goals had to do with marriage and family:
-Have 8 or so kids
-Serve as a senior missionary
-Go on family camping trips
-Read bedtime stories to my kids almost every night
-Be at home when kids come home from school as much as possible
-Weekly Family Home Evenings
-Family physical activities together
-Sing with family on Sundays at least once a month
-Family dinner every day as much as possible
-Learning activities with kids (Explorabook, chemistry set, go to science center, museums, stargazing, etc.)
-Talent enhancing activities for kids (drawing lessons, writing stories, etc.)
-Family picnics, kite flying, games like kick the can at least once a month
-Family trips to state/national parks
-Family traditions (ie: cookies together at Christmas)
-Daily family scripture study and prayer

While I thought finding the list might be inspiring and give me lots of things to fill my time with, it turned out that it just ended up depressing me. I feel like a miserable failure in the goals that are most important.